Saturday, December 22, 2012

Who am I you ask?


First entry was probably confusing. It probably made sense to you and impressed you. If it did (yes you! You know who you are! It was YOUR idea) then thank you. I did not start this blog to talk about my life (hello! It says ANONYMOUS) I’ll be bashing society, marriage, in laws, families and whatever comes into my mind and I’ll start with my own life. Yes, I can bash my life all I want. Put in mind that this page has nothing to do with political views in any kind. I'm a woman, ├índ I don't understand football, politics and cars. Some of you might believe that I’m a broken woman and I’m using the internet to create this persona. On the other hand, some of you might believe that I might be a very strong willed woman with a very weak husband who cannot control me. Both ideas are wrong, I’m a guy. Okay I’m just kidding! Well ironically I’m a very happily married Emirati woman. I come from a very happy well educated background. Life is not always personal. We live in a society and we humans live in groups. We do everything in groups, we’re not loners (loners either end up as serial killers or socially awkward beings, there I said it. It’s my blog I can say whatever I want. Live with it. You’ll see that a lot). Sometimes we like to see others screw up to feel good about ourselves. That’s how we are; we live our lives based on comparison. Didn’t most of us get the mini luggage celine handbag because it’s the IT bag? And most of our friends got it? Yes we did, I bet you all did! THEREFORE, we humans do look upon the life of others. We enjoy that little sneak peak about someone else’s life. The gossip, the secrets, all the hidden facts, that’s why we all follow the private personal lives of celebrities because they’re accessible. We like to read all those juicy stuff. Wouldn’t we like it if it was about that colleague of us who got divorced because (well I don’t know) she cheated on her husband with her brother’s best friend? Or maybe (just maybe) that girl in the finance department who just gave birth few months ago and now she’s pregnant with her second, third or fourth child? That’s why people ask about personal information once a girl gets married the juicy bits: how was it? Ha sawaito shai (the literal translation would be did you do anything? As in, did you get knocked up just yet?), what’s the gender of the baby, how far are you? When’s your due date? Where are you planning to deliver the baby? Why did you pick this hospital? So and so delivered her baby in that OTHER hospital and she was happy (yeah a woman in labor would have half the pain if she delivered her baby according to the map society draws for her). To summarize that, what I meant to say is, we don’t want to be the victim but the story about the martyr next door is our guilty pleasure. And you would read all of that in this blog. If you want me making fun of your life, sisters in law (if you don’t have those, you’re so lucky. I have half a dozen, but hey I’m not complaining.. just yet) you can simply email me on emirati.anonoymous@gmail.com and I’ll gladly bash them for you. That’s what it’s all about, an anonymous blog making fun of life, marriage and people in general (exposing all the facts, but not the personality) . So celebrate with me, because life is a satire.  

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